In theory, a relationship itself is very simple, since it develops in a natural rhythm at the will of the senses: people meet, fall in love, and decide to start dating. But lovers involved in relationships can make them really complicated. The fact is that we are not too pleased with the idea that “we need to work on the relationship.” Why is a harmonious union arising from a great and bright feeling not able to work by itself? Even the heroes of fairy tales do not hope for this. Indeed, relationships require efforts. The intimate connection can be strengthened in two ways:
- demanding more from yourself;
- demanding more from your partner.
No enchantment is required, everything is quite simple and is set out below in 5 tips.
Don’t sacrifice your personal life
This is not about going out on dates – such kind of independence has nothing to do with commitment. You may hold a flame for your beloved, but that does not mean that you should dissolve in selfless adoration. Do not forget family and friends, do not give up evening yoga, Saturday spa sessions, and Sunday dinners with your brother. Take care of your freedom, do not drown your individuality in love, do not get into the habit of excusing and accounting for your actions – having lost the “single” status, you can still do everything you want. It empowers you, builds confidence, and saves a relationship from boredom and routine.
Make time for each other
Yes, you have your own life, but it's also important to find a balance between the private and the common, otherwise, your relationship may wither at the most promising stage. Your love needs care and attention, confessions and romantic strolls, surprises and gifts, dates and cozy home evenings. Be creative, do not spare energy to fuel your tender feelings. This is an effective tip on how to make great strides in
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Don’t skimp on empathy and appreciation
Acting as a team, you cannot oppose each other. This means that you should not take into consideration only your own point of view. Whether you are right or wrong, acknowledge the existence of a difference in human perception. If your partner sees the situation differently, try to understand them and, most importantly, let them know that you respect their view of things. What else? Be a good listener and feel free to be grateful. Even if your loved one just switched on the dishwasher, say thank you. Thank your partner for what they do for you and they will want to do it again to keep you happy. And, of course, your chosen one will be grateful in return.
Don’t try to change your partner
“If I make her lose 10 kilos, she will be much more attractive”, or “If I can wean him from video games, I will be happy”, or “As soon as we get married, he will change for the better” – all these internal insinuations have nothing to do with real love and long-term happiness. If you do not like the way your partner looks, talks, or behaves, you should not be with them. And that’s that. Free yourself from fictitious responsibilities – leave it to someone who will be happy with the original.
Don’t avoid problems
What happens if partners, not wanting to sort things out, constantly turn on the avoidance mode? Nothing good. If you avoid problems for years, they accumulate, and one day, you will wake up 25 years later and realize that you will never be able to figure them out because you have long forgotten where this huge array of problems began. Do not suppress negative (or positive) emotions. Talk to your partner about any issues that bother you. Firstly, you are a team, which means that you need to work together to overcome adversity. And secondly, you always deserve respect and the right to speak up.